A familiversary letter

Dear Small Person, Hopefully by the time you read this you’ll be a big grown up person. Today is a funny kind of anniversary for us. Three years ago a person you don’t know agreed that some other people that you do know were right and they said that we could be a family. You…

Like L’Oreal but the opposite

‘Because you’re worth it’ the slogan of L’Oreal has been playing on my mind today because of a conversation I had with small person this morning. Small person had done something of a higher danger level and I needed to shout (use a more severe tone than normal). Afterwards I wondered about how much small…

Possibilities and Pandemonium

Possibilities are arising for small person’s education. I have been discussing a way for them to move on to a setting which may be able to better facilitate their needs. I hope that it will be positive because currently small person’s love of learning is being outweighed by the pursuit of pandemonium. Haircut tonight has…

You can’t go to that you’re my mum

“You can’t go on a course today, you’re my mum.” Those words were shouted at me when I explained to small person that I was going on a course this morning and would be back in the afternoon. I say course, art workshop is a better term. I went to a print workshop at our…

Multifaceted

The thing about a more difficult time in life is that good things still happen suddenly and remind you that both life and people are multifaceted. Small person is really struggling with school right now. There’s shame and mistrust and anxiety. Hopefully after a productive meeting this week a plan for how to move forward…

Heart rate, happy hand breathing and kindly pedestrians

I have written before about having to use adult strategies with small person who is a child and how difficult that can be. Recently I’ve started to talk to small person about how their heart rate alters when they become deregulated. To demonstrate it clearly I have used a heart rate monitor app on my…

Rainbows, breakages and visitors

Today started at half past midnight and then again at half past 3 and then again 2 and a half hours later. That’s quite a hectic schedule before the day has even started so it’s no wonder I had a headache this morning. I decided that the best approach involved a lot of rainbow based…

It’s just my face

I have a regular conversation with small person in which they shout at me for an aspect of my facial expression which feels totally out of my control. I respond with “I’m really sorry that you don’t like that my love it’s just my face, that’s how it goes.” I used to watch the series…

Books as fuel

Read all the books. That’s my current plan. When I say I’m a voracious reader I mean it. This is my reading list since the weekend. I need to consume words. Sometimes I feel like I’ve run out of words for blogging and I know if I read a lot it’s like I’ll be topped…

Living after midnight (and I don’t mean the song by Judas Priest)

I don’t even mean after midnight in this context. I actually mean after about 8pm. Essentially after small person goes to sleep. Our days are very hard at the minute. Yesterday and today have been both physically and emotionally very demanding. There has been hurting, breakages and unfortunately both Nana and I have lost our…

Ghost Town (and I don’t mean the song by The Specials

At the moment it would just be easier if no one else was around. Not in town,or on any of our walks, or anywhere. People mean an audience, they mean the possibility of shouting or a negative reaction of any kind. So there’s a big possibility of chaos and high adrenaline. Therefore small person creates…

Change in Christmas attitude

Traditionally I’ve really enjoyed Christmas, I’m usually ill for it so I’ve spent many either asleep or unable to eat more than four mouthfuls of soup. But I’ve not wished for it to be over. I have this year. Yesterday when small person was finally asleep after an almost 17 hour day I was so…